In Rocky

Hi!
I can't believe we have been in Rockhampton almost 2 months already - time is certainly flying here. For James and I every day feels like we are sitting on a train watching life's scenes flash by. Between James' full time job, managing the kindy and looking after the children, we are so busy that our heads are spinning. But there is a satisfaction in knowing that now our time and efforts are building our own futures.

Currently James spends Monday to Friday in Brisbane or Sydney working for Fuji Xerox and then weekends with us and working at the kindy. Hopefully he will only be doing this until Christmas and then he'll be living with us in Rockhampton full time.

Jude and Ivy are settling in well. They go to the centre for 2 mornings a week - I typically drop them off at 9am and pick them up again at 1.30pm after their rest time. They are in separate rooms based on age (Jude is pre-kindy and Ivy is junior kindy) but they see each other for outdoor time and can sit together for meal breaks. Jude misses his friends from the Sandy Beach kindy in Melbourne (there are more boisterous boys in his class here whom he doesn't care for) but he'll be moving into kindergarten at the end of January so we're hoping he'll start to make friends then if not before.

Jude is energetic, restless, driven by a purpose, very empathetic, a strong communicator. He gets very nervy around unfamiliar territory and likes everything in life to be fair/just. He is very social and easy to be around most of the time.

Ivy is driven by emotion (and has far too much for any 2 year old body to handle!) so is more complex and prone to a lot of outbursts or tantrums during the day. She's creative, flighty, a giggler, wind up merchant and very unconventional in her approach. I have to manage her in a very different way to Jude - she needs more free reign and space to express herself.

Aden, now 8 months, is a curious little man. He has just entered that cling to mum stage because he has realised that the world is a big and busy place. He is most peaceful when outdoors and very physical - already pulling himself up to standing and crawls on his feet rather than knees. Hi favourite activities are crawling or rolling around on our bed or playing with technology - cables, wires, laptops, phones, speakers, etc. He's already worked out how to switch on a lamp and open the dvd player! He likes to feed himself (and me) finger food - his favourite is yoghurt.

Recently I was reading a book with Ivy and she pointed to the animals in the book that represented each of us. Jude was a colourful parrot (I'm assuming because he moves around a lot and is a colourful, social personality), James was an elephant (gentle giant), she was a baby polar bear and I was a tiger...I'd like to say it's because I have a striking look! Where Jude communicates verbally, Ivy uses facial expression and body language to express her thoughts and feelings.

Jude and Ivy are very competitive with each other and clash a lot but they are incredibly close and break the quarrels up with the most surprising moments of affection. And they are very loving towards Aden - Ivy mostly calls him 'baby' because she loves anything small and sweet and likes to think of him as her pet.

Our weeks are a mixture of routine and discovery. The heat and humidity means very few playgrounds but we have found a nice playgroup and water park nearby...and of course we live on the doorstep of the Botanical Gardens - each time we walk there we do something different - visit the zoo, go to the Japanese gardens, visit the playground, feed the ducks and turtles at the lagoon.

The afternoons are mainly spent doing crafty activities, on the scooters or getting relief with the paddling pool and sprinkler at home.

Rockhampton reminds me of Gloucester - small town, friendly people, slower paced. One of my favourite things to do is drive around the centre of the town and take in the architecture - some beautiful cathedrals and an old post office. It is lit up at night throughout the year like Cheltenham.

We are now focused on Jude's birthday - planning to celebrate the actual day at kindy with balloons and ice cream cake and various Xmas work and social events. We have a naming celebration for Aden planned at a local park in January too. Lots to do!

Nic x

Taking each day at a time

(Chaotic bath time in the early days - I manage it better now!)

Hi,

I begin on my soapbox. It makes me laugh that carers have to justify their 'time out' when choosing to return to the workforce. The number of valuable skills you learn or perfect while being a carer is significant...multi tasking (and doing each task well), people management, prioritisation, psychology, educating, mentoring, role modelling, researching, communicating, networking, selling (trying to make anything unappealing seem appealing to a 2 year old is no mean feat!), working as a team, autonomy, etc.

I recently read a blog that gave me a good tip. We all have a list of a hundred things that we need to do and it's so overwhelming that we often don't tackle it at all. Now I take 3 things from the list to achieve each day - most of the time I get all 3 done but if I don't, I feel less bad about not doing 1 or 2 things as opposed to 100. It's also easy to develop a negative mindset when you spend 98% of your time doing things for others - particularly little people where maximum effort can be rewarded with little thanks or return. Most of you are parents, you know. But I try to think a little differently....

I have three incredible little friends who in their individual little ways, demonstrate imagination and possibility...infectious qualities.

Jude has always preferred the company of others to his own, he is organised (perhaps a tad too controlling at times!) and doesn't miss a beat - he wants to know what every adult conversation is about or why I am doing things the way I am. The latest craze with him is robots...and the moral difference between right and wrong, good and bad.

Ivy is open minded. She will perform a task or play with an object in the conventional way once and then do something unique. She is dogged and attacks her day with ferocious determination and independence. She's into sticks at the moment so I'm trying to come up with different ways to play with them...drums, camp fires, painting them, making a structure...

Aden observes and learns. He watches his brother and sister and analyses. A deep thinker but a cheerful soul at the same time. I have a feeling that he will be crawling and walking early...to keep his siblings in sight.

Whenever I take all 3 for a walk to the park I invariably get the comment "Oooh you've got your hands full" - sometimes several times. I was self conscious at first but now I just feel a bit like superwoman...even when all 3 are losing it at the same time. I don't see many others braving the outside world with 3 so young together...that's got to count for something right?!

Winter is well and truly upon us so outside time can be difficult with Aden. During each weekday morning we have a planned activity - Tuesday and Thursday is playgroup, Monday is 3 hours of kindy, Wednesday a babysitter takes J and I to the park for a couple of hours and Friday we either go to an indoor play centre or the park. Afternoons are just spent at home.

In the background James is working through all the kindy application paperwork. We will hopefully hear in the next week or so as to whether we can get the loan and take on the business. Increasingly I hope we can. I think it will be good for our family life - for us to see James more, to give us a joint vision and so the controlling mother in me can be in the same place as where my children learn!

As always I'll keep you posted. Hope you enjoyed my recent video compilation of the family and thanks to all who sent me bday cards and messages!

Love Nic x

Then there were three

A midwife recently told me that when you have three children, you need to make each feel special in their own way...Jude is the social, organised one. Ivy is creative and courageous. Aden is the gentle soul. 

Now that Aden has passed the tumultuous 6 week mark, he has settled down into a happy little man. He has a gentle way, loves contact with people and very communicative - was smiling and 'talking' from just 1 week old! His relationship with Jude and Ivy is already strong - lots of kisses and cuddles between the three - it feels like he has always been here.

James managed to take a week off for the birth and Aden's first week at home - the kids have loved having him home more. And we have had Barbs and Dad here to support. Dad leaves at the end of this week...quite fitting that he leaves on Australian Mothering Sunday...time for me to stand on my own two feet!

Going from two to three is harder than one to two when they're all so young. Everything has to be planned and well thought through...who to get in the car first, who to take out last. Working around Jude's pedantic ways and Ivy's terrible two tantrums. I've learnt to accept that trying my best doesn't equate to pleasing all and that realisation ironically makes me feel more relaxed. Of course I have my tenser moments like today when Jude decided to pour Dad's shower gel all over the lounge room carpet while I was feeding Aden (leaving me to spend my only free hour of the day to clean up) - but they are thankfully few and far between.

When I am feeding Aden I watch the house fall into disarray around me and smile. Today Jude was running around in his new fireman outfit with the garden hose putting out fires while Ivy was pretending to be a robot (after watching Toy Story for the first time) - the day before Ivy was crouched down and jumping around shouting 'ribbit ribbit' and Jude was the serious doctor in his hospital office.

I am interested to see how Aden is going to get a word in...Jude and Ivy converse non-stop. "No Ivy, Yes Ivy" "Funny Jude, Naughty Jude." They fire questions and comments at me all day long and push me to a whole new level of multi tasking...I now use my mouth, feet, arms and both hands simultaneously to get through each day. However Jude and Ivy are becoming more patient, realising that there is only one of me and three of them making demands. No day is the same despite maintaining a fairly rigorous routine which keeps things interesting for me. Poor James would like a bit more consistency and steadiness I think!

Our kindy business application is progressing through NAB bank and all going well, a move to Rockhampton in July is looking likely...we're excited about the prospect of having our own family business and becoming more financially secure. That being said we love the climate and culture in Melbourne and I will be very sad to leave some great friends behind.

Times of change and challenge ahead!

Love Nic x